Good, bad, worse

Good: You and your spouse agree, no more kids.
Bad: Neither of you can find the birth control pills.
Worse: Your daughter has them.

Good: Your son spends most of his time in his room studying.
Bad: You find a bunch of porn movies hidden there.
Worse: You appear in them.

Good: The husband really understands fashion.
Bad: He cross-dresses.
Worse: He looks better than the wife.

Good: Your son has finally started maturing.
Bad: He's involved with the woman next door.
Worse: You, too.

Good: You do the birds and bees talk to your daughter.
Bad: She keeps interrupting.
Worse: With corrections.

Good: Your wife won't talk to you.
Bad: She wants a divorce.
Worse: She's an attorney.

Good: The postman arrives early these days.
Bad: Wearing camoflage fatigues and carrying an AK47.
Worse: You didn't give him anything for Christmas.

Good: You got home early for a little passion.
Bad: The postman had the same idea.
Worse: You had to wait.